How hot is it?

“It’s so hot the chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.”

“It’s so hot the cows are giving evaporated milk.”

It’s so hot, two hobbits just threw a ring in here.”

It’s red hot. It’s white hot. It’s hot as blue blazes.

Could you really fry an egg on the sidewalk? No, according to the Library of Congress (putting our tax dollars to good use). While the sidewalk might theoretically get hot enough (158 degrees), concrete is a poor conductor of heat, so the egg would not cook all the way through. You’d have better luck frying an egg on the hood of a car.

Six of the hottest things in the world:

1. Death Valley

2. The Carolina Reaper pepper

3. A Hot Pocket straight out of the microwave

4. The shower when somebody flushes

5. The seat belt buckle in summer

6. Idris Elba

How hot is lava? Around 2,000 degrees.

How hot is the sun? About 10,000 degrees on the surface.

How hot is lightning? It can heat air to 50,000 degrees.

How hot is hell? Assuming it’s at the center of the earth, between 9,000 and 11,000 degrees.

Whatever I touch starts to melt in my clutch. I’m too much.” — Mr. Heatmiser.

“This is Africa hot. Tarzan couldn’t take this kind of hot.” — Neil Simon’s “Biloxi Blues.”

“Abandon all hope ye who enter here.” — Dante’s “Inferno.” I think he was talking about my car after it’s been sitting in the parking lot all day.

Love is like a heat wave. Some like it hot. The heat is on.

You can grill a hot dog. You can drink a boilermaker. You can play Hot Potato. But don’t eat the firecrackers. They might give you fire in the belly.

If you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.

You can watch fireworks. You can chase firetrucks. You can catch fireflies.

The firebird rises. The Firefox browses. With enough Firestones, you can build a firewall.

Let’s get fired up!!! Ready, aim … You’re fired.

Winter is coming when exactly?

At least it’s a dry heat.

Lisa Davis is Features Editor of The Anniston Star. Contact her at 256-235-3555 or

Features Editor Lisa Davis: 256-235-3555.