Looking Glass

I JUST THINK WE SHOULD START SEEING OTHER PEOPLE:

A man moved out of the home he shared with his girlfriend in the Queen’s Park district of Toronto without mentioning he had won $6.1 million in the lottery. He claimed that he had been planning to leave for months before he hit the jackpot. She is suing.

DO YOUR FRIENDS CALL YOU SATAN?

Police found marijuana and a set of brass knuckles on a man they pulled over in Marion County, Fla. He had devil horns tattooed on his forehead.

I KNEW I FORGOT SOMETHING:

An armed man who robbed a 7-Eleven in San Diego discovered that he had locked his keys in the getaway car. He had to smash the driver’s side window to make his escape.

IS IT HOT IN HERE OR IS IT ME?

A man tried to board a flight from Iceland to London wearing eight pairs of trousers and 10 shirts in an effort to dodge an excess baggage charge. He was not allowed onto the plane.

HEY, THIS GUY LOOKS SUSPICIOUS:

A man wearing a large white garbage bag tried to rob a pizza joint in Salt Lake City using a long metal pole as a weapon. He ran when confronted by employees, and was captured a short distance away.

OOH, THOSE LOOK TASTY … MAY I?

During a routine traffic stop, Los Angeles Police searched a car where they found 14 foil-wrapped burritos stuffed with meth.

IS IT CHILLY OUT OR IS IT ME?

A man wearing only sunglasses and a pair of boots was spotted dancing around the streets of Levenshulme, England. Someone called the cops, but he was gone by the time they got there.

OH NO YOU DON’T, PUNK!

A man armed with a kitchen knife and wearing a pillowcase on his head tried to rob a Wendy’s in Yuba City, Calif., but a customer hit him over the head with a chair.

NICE SHOES, THEY YOURS?

A young man broke into a home in Great Falls, Mont., and stole a pair of vintage Adidas shoes, which he was wearing when police questioned him.

HEY, YOU GUYS LOOK FAMILIAR:

Two men were arrested for robbing a pizza delivery driver in Pierce County, Wash., when they ordered pizza again a few days later, using the same phone number and address.

OK, I KNOW HOW THIS MUST LOOK:

A man whose job it was to help clients in Charlotte, N.C., get their Social Security payments instead stole more than $37,000 in benefits. He was caught after he took a picture of himself with a large pile of cash on his desk.

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