DON’T BE ALARMED, MA’AM, WE JUST NEED YOUR HELP:
Three men who held up a store in Hamilton, New Zealand, knocked on the door of a woman nearby — still wearing their masks — and asked for a ride so they could flee the scene of the crime.
GEE, WONDER WHY HE WASN’T INVITED:
Angry and jealous that his father and brother had been invited to a wedding and he had not, an Oregon man called airport authorities to report that the two were terrorists who were about to board a flight. Officials figured this one out fairly quickly.
HATE TO SEE YOU GO:
After picking fights with fellow passengers for over a week, more than 20 members of an extended Australian family were forcibly removed from a Carnival cruise ship after they instigated an all-out brawl. People cheered wildly as a small boat transported the troublemakers to New South Wales.
WHAT ARE YOU LOOKIN’ AT, YOUR HONOR?:
A woman accused of public drunkenness and driving while intoxicated showed up drunk at her court hearing in New Holland, Pa.
OK, READY, SET, THROW … AIEEEE!
In an effort to break into a building in Shanghai, China, a burglar threw a brick at a window, but it bounced off with no effect. His accomplice then hurled a brick, but it hit the other burglar in the head, knocking him unconscious.
OH, HI, I’LL BE THROUGH IN A MINUTE:
A homeless man broke into a home office in Van Nuys, Calif., late at night, and used a computer to watch pornography on a disc that he had brought with him. He was restrained by family members who lived upstairs.
TIME TO REEVALUATE OUR RELATIONSHIP:
A man got into an argument with his 18-year-old girlfriend as she was driving on Route 74 in Peach Bottom Township, Pa. He got so angry that he pulled the emergency brake lever, despite the fact that the car was going 60 mph. The vehicle went into a skid and rolled over. He ran away without trying to help her.
A man was arrested for first-degree assault with a firearm, assault on a police officer, malicious harassment and resisting arrest after an incident at a car wash in Factoria, Wash. He was driving a Camaro with the vanity license plate “DIRTBAG.”
I’M THE VICTIM HERE!
A man who has been convicted of drunk driving in Texas four times argued in court that DWI laws discriminate against alcoholics. He lost.
WHAT’S NOT TO LOVE?
A woman got drunk on a flight from the Dominican Republic to New York City, “flirtatiously” touched the head of a male passenger seated next to her, then cursed others, threw snacks and cried that “nobody loves her.”