How many days does it take a humor columnist to change a tire? Read the full story
It happened a long time ago, but Mickey White will never forget it. She was training to be a hostess at Classic on Noble, working alongside her friend, Sonja. (Sonja is not the friend’s real name. The friend wants to remain anonymous as in “keep my name out of this!”)
The Klondike company announced this week it is discontinuing production of the Choco Taco, one of the weirdest ice cream treats to ever exist.
Me: Is anyone going to eat this last donut? Anyone?
When we bought our house three years ago, it had glorious views, a cool modern-y layout and white carpet everywhere. And when I say “everywhere,” I mean the bedrooms, the living room, the dining room, the closets — and the bathrooms. White. Carpet. In. The. Bathrooms.
My husband and I like to watch TV with the closed captions on, because we sometimes have trouble hearing the dialog over the background music. This might be because we went to too many loud rock concerts in our youth, but I prefer to think it’s because Hollywood no longer wants to spend mone…
It’s that time of year again.
I recently showed up on an exclusive list, along with several of my friends and family — but I’m not sure if I should feel honored.
I don’t really get much junk mail anymore. Maybe the occasional scratch-off lottery card for a chance to win a new car!!! (I never win the car. Never.)
I haven’t been to a movie theater since 2019. So far, no new movies have been worth the risk to my health (COVID) or my wallet ($15 tub of popcorn). I’m hoping maybe one of this summer’s blockbusters might lure me out of my cave:
I’m fascinated by birds — including how many sayings we humans have about birds. We compare ourselves to birds (“odd duck”). We compare our politicians to birds (“lame duck”). We threaten people with birds (“You’re a dead duck!”). But I’m not sure our sayings always make sense.
We started off sitting in a circle on the floor, wearing masks and singing our hearts out, even though our voices were muffled and the largest one of us was always short of breath.
I have so many questions, and I will never give up looking for answers. I’m philosophical like that.
So let me get this straight. There is a giant rabbit who appears once a year to hide colorful eggs and leave baskets full of candy … including miniature chocolate versions of himself .. which we then eat. I’m not sure we are showing proper appreciation for the Easter Bunny.
We have officially made it to spring! Let’s give ourselves a collective pat on the back for surviving March. But keep a weather eye out. Just because it’s spring doesn’t mean everything will come up daisies.
It’s time once again for March Madness, the annual ritual in which my husband goes a bit bonkers watching the NCAA men’s college basketball tournament. He yells at the TV. He whoops and hollers and jumps around the living room. He panics the dog and the cat.
They say that, after two years of pandemic, we are entering a “new normal,” but I am skeptical. I mean, can we really move forward as long as Tom Brady refuses to leave the NFL?
My daily routine has been upended umpteen times in the last few months — and that’s not counting what the pandemic did to it. My time sense has gotten so bad, one recent morning I spent 10 solid minutes trying to remember what year it was. (I thought it was 2023, and couldn’t figure out why …
I have a new favorite local radio station. (Yes, I still listen to radio. I realize this dates me.) It’s Calhoun County EMA radio, broadcasting on 95.9 FM in Oxford and 96.3 FM in Jacksonville. In case of emergency, the stations will broadcast emergency information, but the rest of the time …
Nobody besides Samuel L. Jackson has ever asked me what’s in my wallet. But they frequently ask me what IS my wallet?
The Super Bowl is Sunday in Los Angeles at SoFi Stadium. I will be home watching from SoFa Stadium.
There are certain questions that have long troubled me. I finally went looking for answers:
Junk food just keeps getting weirder — and I’m not just talking about the Green M&M losing her go-go boots in a corporate makeover. Here’s a listing of some recent food developments. The twist: There is one fake item. Can you spot it?
I’ve been a fan of word games since I was 10 years old and reading AARP magazine. (My parents subscribed. I didn’t look at the articles, but I absolutely loved the word search on the back page.)
It’s the circle of life. Or, since the following announcement is about music, maybe it’s the circle of fifths.
Me: I think it might rain tomorrow.
