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HOMELAND INSECURITY

And the answer is ...

Today our categories are Venerable Game Shows, Esoterica, Must-See TV, How Many Commercials Can Oprah Be In, Missing Mustaches and GOATS.

Hint: These are not the goats you’re thinking of.

The correct answer is: “Jeopardy! The Greatest of All Time,” the game show’s latest tournament of champions featuring three of its all-time top winners.

The three trivia masters squared off over three nights last week. Their next match will air Tuesday at 7 p.m. on ABC.

I can’t stop watching. I haven’t been so invested in prime-time TV since the very first season of “Survivor.”

A: This contestant holds the record for the longest-winning streak on “Jeopardy!” (74 games in 2004) and is currently leading the GOAT tournament.

Q: Who is Ken Jennings?

A: This contestant is a professional gambler whose approach is “strategically aggressive.”

Q: Who is James Holzhauer?

A: This contestant is the all-time money winner on “Jeopardy!” but is getting skunked in the GOAT tournament, possibly because he’s too slow on the buzzer.

Q: Who is Brad Rutter? (We would also have accepted the answer, “Who is the contestant Lisa most identifies with?”)

A: $415,273

Q: What are the three champions’ combined winnings so far?

A: A Rolls-Royce, a couple of houses or two months’ of Nick Saban’s salary.

Q: What could you buy with that kind of money?

A: Word Nerd, Comma Chameleon, Kid Lit, Obscure British Sitcoms, Coffee and Chocolate.

Q: What are Lisa’s dream Jeopardy categories?

A: “20-Letter Words.”

Q: What is the most mind-boggling category from “Jeopardy! GOAT”?

A: “Gemstones! Meet the Gemstones!”

Q: What is the punniest category from “Jeopardy! GOAT”?

A: Cursive

Q: What Lisa said when the answer was “heiroglyphics.”

A: Anwar Sadat

Q: What Lisa said when the answer was “Hosni Mubarak.”

A: BZZZZZZ!

Q: What is the sound of these guys buzzing in to answer before Lisa has even finished reading the question?

A: “Plane trigonometry employs the law of these ratios between the sides of a triangle and its hypotenuse.”

Q: What is, “Lisa can’t even figure out which part of this is the question”?

A: “Its second line is, ‘All the powers of old Europe have entered into a holy alliance to exorcise this spectre: Pope & Czar, Metternich & Guizot.’”

Q: What is, “Lisa only thought she was smart”?

A: Who is Morticia Addams?

Q: What is the one and only answer Lisa knew that none of the three champions knew? (Ha! Sometimes it pays to watch TV instead of doing your homework.)

Lisa Davis is Features Editor of The Anniston Star. Contact her at 256-235-3555 or ldavis@annistonstar.com.

Features Editor Lisa Davis: 256-235-3555.

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