To: Barack Obama.
Song: “Rid of Me” by PJ Harvey.
Key lyric: “No, you’re not rid of me.”
To: Fox News pundit Dick Morris and the others who boldly predicted a Romney win.
Song: “(We’re A) Bad Trip” by Camper van Beethoven.
Key lyric: “You know, you really shouldn’t take yourself so seriously. If you want to know why, it’s ’cause no one else does.”
To: Gov. Robert Bentley, in light of his decision to forgo a state-created health insurance exchange as part of Obamacare.
Song: “My Prerogative” by Bobby Brown.
Key lyric: “Make my own decisions. That’s my prerogative.”
To: Americans who lack health insurance.
Song: “Waiting Room” by Fugazi.
Key lyric: “I am a patient boy. I wait, I wait, I wait, I wait.”
To: FBI agents whose surveillance of David Petraeus revealed that the CIA director was having an affair with his biographer, Paula Broadwell.
Song: “Wichita Lineman” by Glen Campbell.
Key lyric: “I hear you singing in the wire. I can hear you through the whine.”
To: Petraeus and Broadwell, who are caught up in this adulterous scandal.
Song: “Sacred Love” by Bad Brains.
Key lyric: “I see our love as being sacred, just you and me. We don’t need our business in the street, reality.”
To: Tea Party congressman Allen West of Florida, who has furiously contested his narrow Nov. 6 loss to a Democratic challenger.
Song: “Saved By Zero” by The Fixx.
Key lyric: “Maybe I’ll win. Saved by zero.”
To: Wall Street Journal columnist Dorothy Rabinowitz and many other conservatives who allege that the news media is covering for President Barack Obama.
Song: “Puzzlin’ Evidence” by the Talking Heads.
Key lyric: “You got the CBS. And the ABC. You got Time and Newsweek. Well, they’re the same to me!”
To: So-called doomsday preppers working furiously to prepare for what they see as the coming collapse of society.
Song: “I’m Gonna DJ” by REM.
Key lyric: “I’m gonna DJ at the end of the world.”
To: Alabama football fans, who in back-to-back Saturdays saw their favorite team win a last-minute game over LSU and lose a game in the final minute to Texas A&M.
Song: “Lawyers in Love” by Jackson Browne.
Key lyric: “I can’t keep up with what’s been going on. I think my heart must just be slowing down.”
To: NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg and his ban on large portions of sugary soft drinks.
Song: “See How We Are” by X.
Key lyric: “Now there are seven kinds of Coke, 500 kinds of cigarettes. This freedom of choice in the USA drives everybody crazy.”
To: The new Anniston City Council.
Song: “Righteous Path” by Drive-By Truckers.
Key lyric: “No time for self-pity or self-righteous crap. Trying to stay focused on the righteous path.”
To: Anniston residents hopeful of big things from the new council.
Song: “Beautiful Day” by U2.
Key lyric: “It’s a beautiful day. Don’t let it get away.”
To: House Speaker John Boehner, who must negotiate the so-called fiscal cliff with a hard-to-wrangle Republican coalition behind him.
Song: “Headache” by Frank Black.
Key lyric: “This wrinkle in time, I can’t give it no credit. I thought about my space and I really got me down.”
To: Democrats basking in the re-election of President Obama.
Song: “Color Me Impressed” by The Replacements.
Key lyric: “Everybody at your party. They don’t look depressed. Everybody dressin’ funny. Color me impressed.”
To: The victims of Superstorm Sandy still waiting to return to their damaged homes.
Song: “In the Street” by Big Star.
Key lyric: “Hanging out, down the street. The same old thing we did last week.”
To: Jeb Bush, brother of George W. Bush, who is expected to consider a 2016 run for president.
Song: “Pancho and Lefty” by Townes Van Zandt.
Key lyric: “You weren’t your mama’s only boy, but her favorite one it seems.”
Bob Davis is associate publisher/editor of The Anniston Star. Contact him at 256-235-3540 or firstname.lastname@example.org. Twitter: @EditorBobDavis.