Tonight I was on the phone with my mother in law. We were going over the details of the evening after my husband and I had left their house and I had gone to the doctor and so on.

While I was on the phone with her, a knock came at their door. She answered the door with me on the phone and a very deep sounding voice coming from a young male, said, "Yeah, I need to use your phone." She was uneasy and I could tell, and she said, well as you can see I am on the phone, so just a minute. She told me to hang up and call her later. So I waited about 5 minutes and I called her back. The young man answered the phone and I told him that I must have the wrong number because I was trying to get in touch with my mother in law. The guy must have been really confused or something because he kept saying over and over to her I guess, "its Thomas, Deb.  Its Thomas, Deb."   Finally after several anxious seconds I told him to hand the phone to my mother in law please. Well she got on the phone, and my husband heard my side of the conversation so he was now getting a little anxious and he started asking to talk to his mom. He informed her to tell the guy to leave and get out of the house, etc.   In the meantime, I called the police station in their town and no answer so I called 911. My county connected me to the county they live in and some very nice and professional ladies spoke with me and dispatched my not really a 911 call to the proper authorities. They assured me that they would do a welfare check on  my inlaws and see what the guy was up to. Ok, so I get my husband to get off the phone with his mom and calm down.  All the while getting dressed in whatever I can find, (which wound up being his jeans and an old T shirt, cute!!) and telling him we are on our way to your folks house. He was in the car faster than I have ever seen him move.

I think that my little red Honda takes on a personality of its own. I think it takes on whatever my state of mind is and puts it on the hood and in its lights and says GET OUT OF THIS WOMANS WAY SHE IS ON A MISSION!!! So here we go, down the highway at faster rates of speed than I drive normally or have driven in years.

I made it to their driveway in 17 minutes. Usually its about at least a 30 minute drive because they live about 24 miles away. Anyway, we pull up and my husband goes in the house first. Bless his heart, his 86 year old dad is sitting there watching the Weather Channel and eating milk and cornbread for dinner. My mother in law has gone to choir practice at church and will be back later. All is well.   His dad is alarmed to see us come to the house after we had left not too long before and I explained that we were just looking to be sure all was ok after the guy wanted to use the phone. He said yeah, all was fine, and went back to watching the Weather Channel. God love them!!

So my husband, being in the law enforcement frame of mind he has (he isnt a policeman but we watch a lot of TV) he goes to the neighbors house and sees if that widow is ok. She is and her grandson is there with her. After several minutes of visiting the neighbor, my husband comes in and joins us. We get ready to leave and my mother in law drives up.  She is relieved to know that all is well, and proud of her son for checking on the neighbor.  Again, we get ready to leave.

As we are saying the goodbyes, etc and making sure they are in the house safely, my husband is shining his flashlight in the bushes and on the porches of the houses. Sure enough, I smell cigarette smoke from closeby, and there is clearly no reason for any smoke smell to be around either of these folks houses. I tell this to my husband and as I am saying the words, his flashlight shines on the young man leaving across the neighbors yard.  We drive down to the closest turn around spot and make a definite identification of the suspected person that has been going from house to house using the phone and "hanging out".  The neighbor lady said he had been hanging around the drugstore all day, and the Pharmacists asked if she knew who he was.  My husband and I noticed him earlier on our first trip to their town this afternoon, so whatever phone usage he needed, he clearly didnt get it resolved in the hours we were gone.

So as wee were leaving the small town, I noticed the Sheriffs office cars sitting closeby and I wheeled over to where they were and let my husband tell the details of the young man and the phone usages at the local houses that day and hanging out at the drug store.

Needless to say, the local police department, the Sheriffs Department and I am sure several local citizens that passed by made note of this young man, and talked to him about his actions.

There was no harm done, but to make 3 elderly folks uneasy. They dont realize how times have changed and you dont know everybody that comes to the door, so dont answer it and CERTAINLY dont let them in.

It may have been something and it may not have. But I am so thankful to know that the police and the Sheriff's department and the 911 operators took the time to listen to me, and to take me seriously. They took the time to check out my complaints. My husband took the time to listen to me when I told him about the cigarette smoke and he flashed his flashlight all around to see the guy.

So with that said, just how far does Neighborhood Watch go? 



You just never know when a little red Honda may find a person hiding in the shrubs after he was asked to leave, and we will let the authorities handle the situation.  I dont know the young man, nor what he wanted, but if it was no good, well, its not going to happen on my watch,

even if I am 24 miles away.

From the time I was old enough to pay attention to my parents and grandparents and others being asked how they were doing, that same old phrase, "Im Fine, And You?" has been uttered for as long as I can remember. So as habit or just reflex, that is my standard response now too. Has been for quite some time. But its true. I'm fine. I am frustrated, scared, broke, messy, overweight and a list of other things but so what, I am fine. I have had a great day and I look forward to even better ones and the ones that arent so great, well, hopefully I will live to see a great one after that soon, and I pray that I am a blessing to someone along the way. And those are feelings from the heart. Now, care to know why I am fine? If so, read on. And if you dont, well nice of you to stop by and visit and do come again.

See yesterday I had 2 doctors appointments. Went to both. Pretty good news out of both, except that my Lupus is acting up and on top of that I have shingles. Yep, Shingles. Oh and this is not the first nor the last time, they seem to be the re-occuring type. And my thyroid is gone. Didnt know it until now, but its gone. Didnt feel it going but evidentally thats why I am so tired and so on. But, the Lupus doctor told me to be sure and see someone for a second opinion and I said ok. 

Well today was my special day. I have been looking forward to this day for weeks. We get a lot of junk mail along with the bills but, the ones that look to be of interest, (other than the keys to open a car on some lot somewhere or the ones saying I have been approved for a $100000 loan) yeah right, anyway, I open the interesting ones. And sometimes I hit the jackpot. And I hit it last week. 

I got a coupon for 40% off of a pair of shoes at the Payless Shoestore in the Mall; a free pair of panties or a thong from Victoria's Secret; and a coupon for a free trial size bottle of body wash from Bath and Body Works, along with 20% off a purchase. Well, folks, I have put those coupons in my purse, I have handled them, and reread them so many times I think the ink was about off. Had my gameplan set. Was going to the mall. Was going to get the new shoes; pick out a pair of drawers and then I had used up the last of my Cherry Blossom Bath stuff so I was ready to get some more.

I planned on going Saturday, but my husbands plans changed and he is not going out of town as planned so, I said, ok, today is the day I am going, want to go with me? And to my pleasant surprise he did. And we had a great time.

He was so nice in the shoe store. He helped me and another lady pick out shoes. She said she needed someone decisive to help her so he did. He told her to get the black wedges so they will go with everything.

He was great in Victorias Secret and wasnt embarrased at all to tell me there was nothing in there that would fit him or that he was interested in, (WHEW!!!) and I replied I was just in there to get a free panty. No Thong. So we go to the table she directed us to that had the free panties, and the LARGE wouldnt go around this laptop screen. So needless to say, I didnt get me a pair of panties. But being the tightwad I am, I did use the coupon, and got a pair for my mother in law. She is about 98 pounds and in her eighties so I figured chances are she has never had a pair of Victorias Secret panties. Presented my coupon and the clerk put them in a pretty striped bag and wrapped them in pink paper and we walked out. Not a cent spent.

Went to Bath and Body Works. Sure enough there was a sale there too.  I could get 3 things, get 3 free things and then could use the 20% off coupon and also get a free sample size of shower gel. Man was I happy. To reward my husband for being such a good sport, I told him that I would get the things I want, (cheaper ones) and he could get the 3 free. He was a happy camper  too. So we proceed to the checkout and the man tells me that hubby can get 3 shower gels to go with his purchase, so we wound up with 7 bottles of stuff for him and my 3 that we bought and it was still less than it would have been for just the 3 for me. Off of coupons!!!

Now I am not a new couponer at all. I have been using these things since rebates in the mail still containted cash. I was working and would use the coupons and rebates for lunch money and pantyhose money all of the time.  My sister lives near Atlanta and she still gives me the coupons they get in their papers. I am so happy!! So I use them for dog food and cat food and so on. Love the savings and free stuff.  

Well, we were on our way to the pet store to get the cat and dogs food (yep have a store card there for the discounts) and I saw CARES was open and one of my favorite doctors was there today. I opened the door and there was no one in the chairs waiting. So I took it as a sign to get the refills for the RX I needed for asthma meds and stuff and thought well, I will get that second opinion on these shingles.

Let me tell you, this stuff is not for wimps. My whole body part, (which I wont describe on this family friendly post) is inflamed and red and you get the picture.  Yep, you got Shingles and Lupus too. You must be in pain. Well, yeah I said, but you have to go on. You cant just give up, and stay in bed and cover your head, you have to go on. I have too many folks lives I have to run, so yeah, I hurt but if a 325 milligram aspirin wont take care of it or some CamphoPhenique then well, I dont have time for it. Asthma meds filled, a shot in the other side where the shingles isnt at (now you know) and I was on my way.

We got in the car and my husband lovingly looks over at me and asks, well, hon, how are you feeling?

Without missing a beat, I said, Fine and You?

He is so wonderful to me. He praised my attitude and said he has never seen anyone with the attitude I have when in pain. Cant move, hurt, broken out, and you still laugh and smile.

He kissed the top of my hand, and you know what?

That smile, admiration from him and feeling of love he gives is better than any 325 milligram aspirin or shot in the.........................

So when you see me, just know, if you ask, the answer will always be, I'm fine, and you?

Hopefully. If not, check to see if I am really ok.

Thanks and I hope you have a wonderful day too. I did. Cant wait to see what tomorrow brings.

I am not real sure what "IT" is, but Bless Her Heart, that was some of my mothers favorite words. Dont get rid  of anything good, somebody might can use it. Just drop it off here and I will go through it. Well, I have inheirited her same thoughts. And stuff. And more stuff.  Now, sometimes I get some really good stuff, but most of the time I just hoard it up here at the Ponderosa and then, well, I have to find a place to put it. And well, to be honest, I am running out of space. Not only in the house, but the carport is getting full and the car, well, its got just enough room now to get a bag of groceries in there. If you smash them in there. Ok, I will admit it, I think that sometimes I do keep things that I shouldnt. But if you watch television like I do, there is a show almost every night showing where someone finds an old phonograph or a picture frame or a book that is worth LOTS of money. I mean, LOTS of money. But for some reason, that has Never happened to me. And I just have a feeling its not going to happen to me.

Sometimes I get a really great something though. Like when my aunt died. Her daughter called and said she was getting rid of all of her moms clothes and would I want to come and get them. So yes, sure, I will be more than happy to come over. And load the Honda. And I did. Oh was I happy. I loaded clothes, belts, purses, shoes and all sorts of other stuff into that car until you almost couldnt close the door. Then I got home and unloaded it into the living room. Beautiful dresses, in a size 12. My heart sank. I was born in a size 12. My right leg is a size 12. I come from a family where anybody under 200 pounds looks "puny", so I dont know where she got a size 12 from, so it goes into the pile to go somewhere else.  And then the shoes, well, if you wear a small size in dresses, you get the picture.

Not a whole lot of 7W in there. As a matter of fact, nothing in my size in the way of shoes and few clothes. But nonetheless, I kept lots of stuff. My mom could use a large portion of the things, and I was so glad to get the for her. Not a problem.

When I was about to give up hope, my eyes fell on a box, a Playtex Bra box. I was so happy. It was a sign of things to come!!! Yeah!!! I havent had what I would call a good bra in several years. Several. So without hesitation I grab the box. I look lovingly at the brand new, no wire, shapely bra. So very happy. So it goes back into the box for the day I will wear it in public.

The day came. I pulled, pushed, smashed, and put everything where it was supposed to go. I didnt pay attention to the size, just that it was new. After quite a while of tucking and pressing and carrying on, I got it on. I felt great. A little hard to breath, but did I feel like I looked good!!! Well, as good as I can anyway.

A week or so passes and I get a call that my youngest nephew is moving to California. His wife has lost a lot of weight and they are getting rid of her old "bigger" clothes and my sister wanted to know if I would be interested in some of her clothes.  "Are you kidding?" Yes, I screamed, yes, bring them on. I will be thrilled to get some of her stuff!!!

So within a few days, 2 large black Hefty size lawn and leaf bags arrived at my house. I was so happy. Here I had won again. All new clothes. This time I could wear some of them and even though the young lady is quite a few years younger than I, she had excellant taste and yep, you guessed it, there was a bra in there. Oh man, this is like winning the bra lottery!! So pretty and full nice straps. YEAH!!

So, I gather the clothes I can wear and use and clean them and the bra and am so happy with my new belongings. I tried on the freshly laundered bra and sure enough, it fit. I have no idea what size it was but it fit and I felt good in it.

Well, as luck would have it, I developed a nasty cold and flu and the doctor wanted to take Xrays of my chest. Fine. Not a problem. Like the confidence of knowing all of the answers on a test, I felt the courage and confidence to have the Xrays taken and not be ashamed of my under coverage.

The nurse is putting the Xray camera down close to the area she needs to look at and says that is a nice bra you have on, where did you get it?

Well, never having been faced with such a question, I didnt know what to say or how to answer, so with a very red face, (I didnt want to say a dead aunt or a niece in law that lost weight) so I lied. I said Sears.

I felt so bad about that lie. The poor lady is probably still looking somewhere for that wide strapped bra with the full coverage.

But there is such a thing as Karma or payback or God telling you dont be proud of things, and I was proud of that bra. Sad, isnt it. Well, it gets sadder. Much sadder.

I came home one evening and was taking off the shoes and so on and I couldnt get the bra off. I dont mean unhooking it, I mean, couldnt get it to come off. At all. Nothing. Nobody home to help me, and this isnt the kind of thing you just ask a neighbor to assist with, so I had to do the unthinkable.

I had to cut the bra off. It was after I had turned, twisted and struggled for longer than I care to write about, but I had to cut that thing off. And for the first time in my life, I was sad about a bra. Sad that I had lost one of the two good ones I had in several years. Sad that I had lied about where I got it because to tell the truth I didnt know.

As if that wasnt sad and bad enough. The other one met a bad fate. An accident in the washer ripped the whole side out of the front. No repairs. Nothing to do but throw it away.

So now, I am on the lookout for a new bra. One that fits. One that has broad straps and nice front coverage, and this time, I think I will purchase my own bra.

Gosh, I hope Hoarders doesnt read this Blog column.  They might just think I have a problem.

I am beginning to think as I look around, I might.  Sad.  But it makes me happy to know that I am temporarily giving a lot of stuff a good home.  At least till somebody can use it.

And sags and splotches and blotches. Sounds like a commercial doesnt it? Well, its not, its me.

And you know what, I am glad I've got them. I am unique. There is no one else like me. Not weird, just unique.

See I was talking with my best friend tonight, and we were talking about life in general. She was telling me things that have gone on in her life and was asking about some of the things in mine, and as I told her some of the sorted stories, she was sorry for me. And that made me feel odd. Not that she felt sorry for me, but that someone would feel that way about me.

See, I dont claim to be a beauty, and you can tell by looking at my photo on here that Miss America hasnt been trying to call me, but I am me.

I am fine with being me. I have earned every line, crease, wrinkle, scar, blotch, splotch and sag I have. I wear them as badges. I wear them with honor. I kinda look at my life as a charm bracelet, and every part has a story to tell.

Some arent pretty, some arent bad. But its life. And the best thing I can say is that its been a pretty good one. I have had a wonderful husband for many years of my adult life, and I pray he will see me on into the day when Willard Scott has to annouce my 100th birthday on the Today Show.

I have wonderful parents, even though my father died when I was young, he still lives in my memories, so therefore I still have him. And you all know how I feel about Moma. She is just my bestest of all friends.

I have great siblings, that even though there are years between us, have instilled in me love and security and knowledge of the meaning of family that many on the outside must admire.

My inlaws are just extended family, not INLAWS at all. They love me and I do them. I am so blessed they have taken me in and made me the daughter they never had. 

So, when someone says something that hurts your feelings or makes you sad or makes you feel less than you are, then just think of this one little thing.......

Everybody has a wart on their behind somewhere.  (You can change the word behind for whatever you want, but this is a family page after all). But the meaning is, no matter what someone else says or does to you, they are not perfect. They have some shortcoming and are trying to make up for it by making you feel small. But dont. Just think of them with that wart, or freckle or mole or whatever you want to, but just know, Miss America or Mr Universe isnt calling them either, so smile and know you can always come here to the  Musings Blog

and hopefully I will make you smile. Or laugh out loud, or at least feel like you have a friend, even if I'm not Miss America.

For those of you that know me, or have read any of the blogs, you know that I am close to my Mom and she is experiencing some health problems right now, so I have been a little delayed in posting anything here. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers and I will keep you informed as I find out things but for now, heres whats on my mind tonight. Hope you enjoy.

We are each alotted 24 hours in a day. There is no more for the rich person and no less for the underpaid. So what we choose to do with that time is our own decision.  As for me, I think I am going to eat off my china.

See I found this extremely beautiful China pattern back in the late 70's or early 80s. It was before my husband and housekeeping, and when I was living at home with Mother but I had a HOPE Chest and wanted to fill it with as many of life's beauties as I could. So I bought this wonderful full set of China.  And it remained packed for several years.

When I married, I used it for the first anniversary, for the first dinner party we had with the family and so on. Then it was repacked. And stored. And we moved. And the china moved. And it has been used two or three times for showers and things like that but the rest of the time, you guessed it, packed away with pieces of tissue in between each plate. The platter rests on my counter and with care I lift it from time to time and admire the pattern of pink roses twined within the grey lattice work. Lovely to behold. But hard to sell. I know because I have tried to sell it twice. No offers. Not one, so I figure its a sign. 

Several of the pieces have never even been used. But not for long.  

I have decided that tomorrow when I prepare my loving husbands lunch, we will eat on China. Why save it for a special occasion when life is a special occasion? 

Why wait for a special time to do something? Or say something kind to that person standing next to you? Or make up with someone that you have hurt their feelings ?  Take time out of your 24 hours and make a dfference in someones life.

 Be kind. Eat off the china. Run with scissors (carefully). Laugh at yourself. Dont try to be perfect all the time. No one is. Sing like no one is listening. Pray and listen to your heart when you do. 

We dont know what tomorrow holds, but for me and mine, looks like a burger and tots on china. 

And by the way, if you see the white haired lady in the red Honda and she is singing, its not because I have a great voice, its because I do sing as if no one is listening. And most of the time, they're not.

By now you are probably singing the rest of the song to yourself. I know I have many times since I started thinking about what to write tonight. There are other sayings of course and some that ring true no matter how old we were when we learned them.  I learned a new one tonight.

I was talking with a friend that has been a true friend since we were in Elementary school. She and I went to church together, we went to school together and even though family time, and work schedules and well, just life in  general got in the way, we didn't get to sit and laugh like we used to.  But since I have not been working for the past few years and have gotten back to my roots, so to speak, well, the friendship has picked back up and we talk. And we laugh. And we share.

You may know her already, her name is Laura Hollingsworth Vaughn.  She is the owner of the Weaver Hardware store in the little town where we grew up. She has been on the local news displaying her handiwork of caning chairs and she has been written up in the local county newspaper. She is a celebrity of sorts in this neck of the woods, and she well deserves any credit she gets for being such a great person.

She has a laugh that is contagious. She has a spirit that makes you feel better about yourself like a warm spring day. And she has a story to tell.....about just about anything.

Tonight she called to see how my mother is doing and to check on me since I am battling this rotten cold, or allergy or whatever has decided to invade my body and make me sneeze and cough and sound like a man when I answer the phone.  

Well anyway, Laura had me thinking about the above saying. To say someone is an old friend doesn't sound so politically correct these days, sounds as if we are talking about age, but when you are the same age as someone, its ok.  I think.  She is an old friend and we keep things old school.

We can talk about times in Weaver when life was simpler. No complications and no pressure. Oh then there were boys and well, everything changed. And then we start to laugh again. She has stories on that too.

Proms; photos; graduation; vacations; you name it. She can remind you of it and make you forget the aches and pains and problems of the day. At least for a while anyway.

Tonight the saying she taught me was something she said she thought she heard in an old movie and she made her husband watch the movie about 40 times, and the saying never appeared, but she remembered it just the same.

The saying she heard or imagined or was "Seek God before you Seek Breakfast."

I like it. As a matter of fact, I love it. She said it in that southern drawl she has and all I could imagine was someone taking a plank of wood and painting those words on it and then it would be on bumper stickers and sewn into pillows and sold all over the world, making tons of money for someone.  Of course it wouldn't be us, because you cant patent words, but you can put things on your tombstone and you know, I was thinking of having something witty like, "Are you sure I'm really dead?" or Laugh at the things I told you and Remember the things I taught you, because I cant remember them anymore, so how about reminding me of them?

But if I could have something for folks to remember, I guess it would be, Make New Friends But Keep Ye Olde......Cause they are the ones that are your comfort in sad times, good times and if you haven't heard from your old friend, look them up.  I hope you have a Laura in your life. She is a blessing, and I mean that.  And she will be ticked at me for bragging on her, but when someone knows you all through the years and still wants to be your friend, you cant beat that.

Look up an old friend, and if you cant look up an old friend and catch up, then make a new one.

There is always someone that can use a smile or a door opened for them or a newspaper that you are through reading, or a seat in crowd. Doesn't matter if you don't see them again, at least you will have made their day a little nicer and hopefully they will pay it forward.

Just imagine what a wonderful world that would be, if we all had a friend. A true friend. New or old.

I have been thinking about this particular blog for a while now. Usually they just fall out of my head and I type them, but for some reason, I just didn't feel like I had all of the information until today.

See, I confess, I am a 70's Disco Dancing Queen. Yep, oh you cant tell it now that I danced at the local small town disco, but I did. To look at me now with a much shorter stature than I had 40 years ago, and white hair and sometimes depending on the weather, a limp.....but during 1977 and 1978, I was a dancer. Not a professional dancer, except in my mind, but I was a dancer all the same. I could just hear the beginning notes of a song and I knew what moves I was going to make on the dance floor before I ever left the house.

I had the outfit. I had the dress that was longer and would sweep the floor, or the polyester suit that had a really, shiny, tacky blouse with it. Somewhere there is a photo of that outfit, and I still remember how great I thought I looked on that dance floor. Of course, it was only me that thought I looked that good, but hey, I liked it. And if the truth be told, the other folks thought they were just as great looking.

See, in the small town of Weaver there were no discos. As a matter of fact there were few boys at my school that I would ever even dare ask to dance with me, much less, go to a disco, but there was one boy, Billy and he was a dancer. He was a good dancer too. I saw him when we all had PE in the gym on rainy days and he could put on a Bee Gees 8 track tape and he could do moves like I had only seen on American Bandstand. He was that good.

So I got the courage to tell him one day how well I thought he danced and he told me that on Tuesday nights, there was a place up the road from Weaver and it would have DISCO night for teens. We were not old enough to drink, but the bar would open up and allow teens to come and dance and they would serve regular Coke and Sprite type beverages. Ok, I am in. Take me and show me this place that sounds too good to be true.

But it was true.  It was dark and dingy but to me it was as close to NY City as I was going to see. It was not exactly like the Disco in Saturday Night Fever but they had a disco ball and they had some Christmas lights that went around in a circle, so to me that was close enough. The Christmas lights were originally used with aluminum Christmas trees I think, but have no proof.

But it was magical. It was wonderful. It was fun.  I danced the night away and wanted more. I was hooked. I found my niche.  I invited a friend of mine, by the name of Ann and she invited her nephew and before long, we had our own table. We had a table full of dancing Disco folks!

Great times. Lots of dancing and we were known in that Disco. Man, did I feel like I fit in somewhere. For the first time in my life, I fit in.

To this very day, I can hear just the opening line of Stayin Alive and I start tapping my foot. Or my finger, depending on which one is not hurting at the time. Oh such memories. 

Now, the Alabama connection to Saturday Night Fever.

While watching the Biography show the other night, there was a man on there by the name of John Badham. He is from Alabama, but I don't know what city, but he was the director of the movie, Saturday Night Fever. He was the Director!! He is from the same state I am from and yet he had such a hand in changing the way America dressed, acted and the music we listened to for a time in history. But not only was he the director, something he said caught my attention.

He said that when they went to the Disco that was used in the movie, that it too was not anything like he expected. It was pretty much like the one I had gone to all that long ago. He said the part that bothered him was the floor and the lighting was so drab, so he remembered where he grew up in Alabama that there was a club and it had lights in the floor. They had lights all over the place and he found out that the manufacturer of the lighted floor was in NY City, so he had them make a floor like the one in Alabama. 

Can you imagine?  The iconic floor in the movie was from something he grew up with in Alabama!!! How neat is that!!!

So it makes me wonder if I was ahead of my time by going to a club on Tuesday nights that only served Sodas and had bad lighting, but made such an impression on my life.

I might not be able to Boogie now, but I am really good at singing the songs, as long as you dont turn down the radio.......I dont remember all of the words like I used to.  But in my mind, I am still a Dancing Queen, only 17.........

Remember ABBA?  Now how did the rest of that song go??????

Evidently I have a knack for drawing out stories. Even if it is someone I don't know and they just happen to stop me for some reason, oh say, for a traffic violation, I feel the need to talk. And Talk, and talk. Not a rant, mind you, but just carry on a long, drawn out conversation as to why I am in the particular shape I am in causing the person to stop me. Now, I have all the respect in the world for the men and women in the line of duty, and I was very cordial and even thanked the gentleman for giving me the ticket, but it was the ordeal that was so well.....humorous.  Or so I thought. My husband, well, he didn't think it was quite so funny. So what do you think?

I went to a meeting in the small town I grew up in and visited with friends afterwards. We haven't seen each other since before Christmas and there was so much catching up to do. Well, Debo and I stayed behind and we visited for quite some time. It was great. Lots of laughter and just a great time of fellowship between two old classmates. Ok, so I move on and do the other things I have planned before I am on my way home for the evening.

As I am turning towards the road bringing me home, I have on my blinker and am at a stop, waiting to turn right. Ok, all is clear, so I proceed. About the time I start to turn, I see an Alabama State Trooper eye me and not in the good way. I get about 100 yards down the road home and here come the blue lights. I pull over in a church parking lot and sure enough, he comes behind me. Lights flashing. Ok, so here we are on a busy Sunday afternoon and all I am thinking, is well, wonder how many folks know me in this red Honda and are saying, well I wonder what she was doing.....speeding probably. Nope, its stranger than that.

As the gentleman is putting on his hat to exit his car, I roll down my driver side window and proceed to hold my arms out, towards the heavens, so that he can see, I am not armed, but I need to tell him something.  Now, I know from being around law enforcement people, (and watching my fair share of COPS on Saturday nights) that to try to exit the car is going to end up with me in trouble, so as he is getting out of the State car, I am telling him, I have to open the door because I have to tell him something. All this time, he is telling me that I am to stay in the car, and I hear him,  but I am talking at the same time, and finally get the point across that I will have to pitch him the keys to my car, because you're going to want my license and they are in my purse and my purse is in the trunk, so do you want the keys or do you want me to get the license? And while he is contemplating what the crazy woman is saying, I am shouting, "Now don't shoot me, cause I am coming back there and get my purse."  So you can imagine by now the crowds of people driving through the local Sonic so they can see what is going to unfold and the dogs across the street are barking, and of course its around 5 in the evening, so EVERYBODY is driving by.  Well, here I am and I get the purse and the license and I am in the middle of my long story about how I am coming from Moma's house and I am in the middle of taking the blankets and other things to her up at the Rehab Center, and go into the details about her falling on Christmas Day and then she broke her tailbone and so on.  The man, bless his heart, is standing there looking at me as if I am an alien, as in from outer space, because he is trying to get a word in edgewise and the whole time I am telling him, " well I guess you can tell I am telling the truth, about Moma and the Rehab Center cause,  I mean, who else would have older lady clothes and Depends in their trunk. "  Well, the nice State Trooper, just asked me for the insurance card and about the year of car and just the usual stuff. Then he said, do you know why I stopped you?

Now to a normal person, I guess that would have been the first thing in their mind, but to me, I was just not sure and told him I had no clue.  So he proceeded to explain to me that its against the law to drive with no seat belt, and I need to get it fixed. Ok. Should have let it go at that, but NOOOO   I have to talk. So I tell him that I have planned to get the car to the dealership for an oil change and will have them look at this but I don't want to be there all day and so I have to wait until my husband is off so he can take me and he has to work all of those weird shifts like you all do, and so it just hasn't been a good time.  (WHY AM I STILL TALKING??) 

So, I tell him that I wont lie to you fella, but I just couldn't get it on. See, and I bring him to the area of the car where he can see that yes, indeed my seat belt is in a knot.  Yep, a knot. Not where you can do anything about it, not where you can see it, but where it is inside the hole it goes in and wont come out, so unless you are a very small person and have legs that enable you to drive from the trunk, my seat belt is not going to work with you.

Even the State Trooper, a Mr. Webb, said he had never seen anything like that and that he has no idea who to take it to or where I am going to get it fixed, and he went back to his car and shut the door.

So I stand there, on the side of the church parking lot, tugging at this seat belt, and making a larger scene I am sure than he was really ready for, and proving that the seat belt would not budge. All of this time I was thinking, well since I told him about Moma, and he sees the seat belt in a knot, he wont write me a ticket.

No such luck. He comes back, and I must say, he is a very tall man. I felt shorter than normal next to him, and was still trying to work on the seat belt, then I noticed it was beginning to get dark.  Lights still going, but there was a small problem that I couldn't share with him, see I have a headlamp out too.

I don't drive at night, so I make sure I am home before the need to turn them on comes around. If its raining, forget it. And I wont drive it if there is a funeral procession I have to be in. Well, not yet anyway.

So he writes me the ticket. Then he proceeds to tell me that I need to get it on because what would happen to Moma if something like an accident was to hurt me ?  Nice man, and then the strangest thing happened.  He turned to leave, and I thanked him.  Thanked him for the ticket. Yep, right there on the side of the road, I thanked him and then I felt stupid for thanking him and told him. Mr. Webb smiled and got back out of the car and told me a story about how his grandmom had died not too long ago and I could see he just needed to talk.

Well, normally I would have more sympathetic, but as I said it was getting dark and all I could think of was, Please Mr. Policeman, go the other direction when you leave so you don't see my one headlight. Or, better yet, I will just sit here and if you act like you are waiting for me to leave, I will just start putting clothes and items in these donation boxes here. That way you can go ahead and do whatever you need and I wont get caught......hopefully.

But, he started up his Trooper Car and as he started to leave, I told him Thank you again, and he acknowledged me and said that maybe he saved my life when he stopped me. Maybe by me getting the ticket I will get the seat belt fixed and will be ok.  So with that, he started to dive off and I said aloud, yes, Mr. Webb, I will get it fixed, but maybe, just maybe, I saved your life today too.

See I think that God puts us where HE wants us at the time He wants us there. So yes, I got the ticket. Yes, I was at fault. But, in my long, drawn out story to the Policeman, then maybe, I saved his life by having him avoid something down the line.

Makes me think of the times when we say, "well if only I had left a few minutes earlier or later or taken another road, or

........."

Yeah, Mr. Webb, thank you. Thank you for saving my life, and I hope sir, I returned the favor.

To those of you that know me, you know I am married to a wonderful man that puts up with all of my eccentric ways and lets me have all my pets. Or babies as I refer to them. He is a hard working man and has been my friend and soul mate for as long as I can remember. He even finds humor in living with me, which in itself is a miracle because, well, I have bad days too. I know that seems hard to fathom, but yes, I am kinda hairbrained at times. To put it nicely, he says it is like living with Lucille Ball. You just never know whats going to happen or what I am going to say. Example today......

We were driving down Quintard going to eat pizza at one of my favorite places, Mata's. I could just imagine the cheese and spices as they lingered in my mouth and on my toungue. Oh how this is so not on a heart healthy diet, (hopefully my Cardiologist doesn't read these blogs) but its such a welcome treat once in a while. So I wasn't really thinking about what I was saying as we passed the local Burger King. I have a habit of reading aloud the signs on the roads, highways and wherever, and of course I did this particular sign that announced they have SEC Biscuits.

Well, I was just so impressed. I must have shown some enthusiasm as I read the sign aloud, because without missing a beat, he said, thats not what you think, Deb.

He continued on to the traffic light and I asked "well then what does it mean?" They have SEC biscuits and I think that's great."

He so lovingly looks at me and tells me that doesn't mean that they have Alabama and Auburn biscuits, but it means SAUSAGE, EGG and CHEESE. 

All of this time my active imagination is going, and he continues to tell me as if he were explaining this to a 2 year old, that BEC means they carry BACON, EGG and CHEESE. And CB is not the radios but Chicken Biscuit, and so on.

But my thoughts were racing thinking that I have seen commercials that show this device that you can order and it will imprint your toast with the logo of the college of your choice. So why not? Why cant Burger King have SEC biscuits with logos of Alabama and Auburn? Make a contest to see which one sells the most. Use it as a fundraiser for the schools or to save the trees at Toomer's Corners or something. 

I don't know why I am not like normal folks and can pick up on things like Sausage Egg Cheese Biscuits for sale. I don't know why regular cucumbers don't have to be labeled "pickling cucumbers" or why      MING SOON is not some sort of new

martial arts.  I really thought that I was impressing him one time with the announcement that the new gym was going to have MING SOON and he should take lessons since he liked that sort of stuff.  No, I didnt see the C and O that had fallen off the sign and was announcing that new weight machines were COMING SOON. 

I am not a stupid person, I just have a different imagination than other folks. And I never grew out of it.

So its not so bad being married to Lucille Ball, I don't guess. Either that or he is just sticking around to see what happens tomorrow....who knows what may be MING SOON to this house.

Stay tuned.

I'm not talking about Girl Scout Cookies, although its just about time for those delicious treats. I am talking about time to bring out the cookbooks and the gardening books.

Every day I get a new catalog full of beautiful bulbs and seeds and all sorts of gadgets I just cant live without. I line them up and take them with me from the recliner to the bed and have a trusty pen with me at all times to circle all of the lilies and shrubs and flowers I am going to plant. I just imagine how wonderful my yard will be in the Spring with all of the colors of the rainbow and every scent you can imagine just wafting through the windows and going into the neighbors yards. Oh how wonderful it will be.......

And when not carrying the loads of catalogs and flowering plants books, I have cookbooks with me. I have a cookbook for low cal foods and dinners, I have a cookbook for slow cookers and some from the telephone company that are worn and ragged but still usable.

Trusty pen in hand, I get the piece of paper that will be my closest friend for the next few days while I scout out the needed ingredients for the massive amounts of food I will prepare for my husband and family. Oh, I am so thrilled to think about the scents of herbs and spices boiling and filling the house with what I equate to the smell of love.

I have these books all over the bedroom, next to the chairs, in the kitchen and just everywhere. There may be one or two in the car, I dont know.

Then reality sets in.

The thought of having to go outside in the heat of summer and deadhead those plants, water them, replant what has died from neglect, clear out the weeds, cut the grass, cuss at the lawnmower that quits and wont start back, well, the dream of that beautiful yard just goes away.

So I go back to the recipe books. Oh how wonderful those glossy photos look. So tempting.

Ok, get the list made. Get the sales paper showing who has the best price on hamburger or chicken.

Get depressed at the price of hamburger or chicken.

Look at the kitchen, and think of what pots and pans will have to be used to cook such delicious meals.  Who is going to clean them up? What will we do with the leftovers after we are tired of them? Do dogs eat beans with their cornbread?

Now I have all of these cookbooks and gardening catalogs to do something with, and thats another chore, cleaning the rooms that I have neglected because I have been too busy cooking and landscaping in my mind.

Then the thought hits me that everyone must have a dream. Most folks dream of being rich or traveling, or doing some great thing with their life.

My dream is a clean house, beautiful yard, clean car, and well cooked meals 3 times a day.

So to be able to dream, I must go back to sleep, and these days with the weather so bleak and dreary, I am finding that sleeping is a new hobby and one that I am becoming quite fond of.

In reality the yard wont be beautiful, the house wont be clean and the meals will be take out more than likely, but in my dreams, its a wonderful place.   

Hopefully I will see you in my dreams, cause they are quite wonderful. Now if I can just get the smells to incorporate with the colors, I will really have it made.